Who is to blame?
Ever done something really stupid? Ever had an accident where you were totally at fault? Ever had that sickening realisation that you’ve totally forgotten something really important?
I certainly have, and if you have, that’s good, because I have a feeling that you’ll be able to understand what I’m talking about.
Admitting when we’re wrong, or when we’ve simply made a mistake that has had negative consequences is not an easy thing to do - pretty sure that you would all agree with me on that!
That feeling - it’s horrible isn’t it? Realising, admitting, accepting, maybe even having to apologise to others for something we’ve done: ‘eating humble pie’ as the saying goes, tastes mighty bad.
But let’s take a couple of steps back - back to the point where whatever it is we were doing went wrong. It could be anything, from changing a light bulb to making a cake, or trying to fix a door that just won’t fit, or even a car accident.
The feeling that things have gone sideways isn’t a pleasant one and I don’t know about you, but for me it can result in some heightened emotions - things like disappointment, disbelief, shock, frustration and anger can just hit us. The next thing usually is to start looking for something or someone else to blame! ‘I had bad tools, the light was no good, it was late, I was tired, it was never my job in the first place, if everyone did what they were supposed to, I would never have been put in that position’ - and so on and so on. I’m sure you might have some of your own experiences that you can think of.
In Galatians 6:4 we read (NCV) “Each person should judge his own actions and not compare himself with others. Then he can be proud for what he himself has done. Each person must be responsible for himself.”
You would think that accepting responsibility for ourselves and our own actions is a no brainer; how hard can it be right? I work with people, and I can tell you that shifting blame and placing responsibility for our situations onto others is like an epidemic!
Yes, people can do silly things, sometimes even nasty, hurtful and hateful things. But I’m sure that we don’t ever want to see ourselves as one of those do we? Yet can you or I honestly say that we have never done anything hurtful? Sad as it is, I know that I can’t.
Blaming others for our current difficulties or situations, whatever they are will get us nowhere. Whilst it can protect us from that feeling we mentioned before - it often results in bitterness and can lead to worse trouble than what we started with!
On an individual level, we can only control ourselves, we control how we react to the difficulties we are faced with - whether they come from our own, or others actions.
Having the understanding that we are responsible for ourselves and everything we do can really help as we negotiate the daily grind of our lives. When things go off track, instead of looking for someone to blame (or something to throw) look for a solution & before acting, think about what your response will be and what impact it might have on the situation, on you and on those you care about.
The bible says that “A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.” Proverbs 15:1 (NLT)
Imagine how much better our world would be if more people were able to admit when they made a mistake and take responsibility for their actions, rather than blame others and look for payback.
The bible is full of great advice like this - as well as containing an amazing message of hope for our planet and anyone who cares to look!
Get hold of a bible and have look - If you don’t - you will only have yourself to blame!